It hurts that we are somewhat satisfied being the symbol of weakness,
uneducated decisions and inepititude. Offcourse, it's nice for someone else to
take the whole blame, i mean yeah! we can blame the world for defining but then
who is to blame for accepting, who is the blame for letting them? We can blame
every other person all we want but at the end we played a huge part in getting
to where we are right now.
This war we are fighting is not
just a physical one but mostly mental. Our mental state. The world and this
context, especially African women have agreed to the society's idea of who and
what a woman is in some way. I mean yes we can go out and claim that we are
feminist because we have the kids and the job or because we let our hair grow
natural and so on. The real question is where are the female inventors and
ground breaking scientists coming up with cures being role models to the
little, anxious girl in secondary school who is most excited when she is in
chemistry class or that get inspired just by looking up at the sky, but nooo we
can't stay too long in school studying those kind of courses cause then who is
going to be left to marry us, while, those that dare to take up this courses
then move on to be frustrated by the same society that is supposed to be
embracing them.
Let me tell you were a lot of us
are failing. I often hear guys say "I'm looking for a reserved girl, or
oh! she stays with her folks she's definitely the marriageble type a good
girl". They sure didn't come up with that on their own. So where are the
mothers, aunties teaching what really to look for in a lady, not naive,
gullible, submissive and obedience, which mum will not freak out when they see
their son come in with a lady that has a strong opinion of what she wants her
home to look like. Do you know that men are attracted to omen like their
mothers. Granted our moms and their moms before that did not teach them any
better. So we have refused to teach our kids to dream , dream beyond society
limitations. We have let the word feminist to even exist and noe become irky in
conversations. Well at least we get to go school around here right? Still it
won't hurt to move forward and allow these girls use them to build skyscrappers and walk through
the glass doors of their companies instead of just having a flashy marriage
resume.
We need people and i don't mean 5 or 10 amoungst millions though that's a
start to pave the way for those budding girls, those that have have tuned out
the world telling them they've got "big eyes" or how impossible their
dreams are and question them at every turn. They want it and they are willing
to do the work for it. They are wondering if they'll need to sleep with
everyone who they give a proposal to or if they must take on a male business
partner before they can be taken seriously. All they need is a chance to prove
themselves.
Yes,there is a movement though not as loud as it needs to be, or fast
because most of us are too ashamed to stand with this cause which is our birth
right, and yes we now have songs, books, papers, calling us out to this
remarkable awakening but still they are still those of those tht are letting
people use the word "feminist" as an inside joke for women that are
either are sucessful and strong that it intimidates or threaten their egos or
for those ladies that are either unattractive or unmarried. We will keep
sharing the joke until our daughters can't even say the word "feminist"
because then it has become a curse word.
We need to fight it little by little but everyday, it could be as small as
giving a thumbs up! and a sacarstic smile to that lady that says "you
drive like a lady" or do something like a lady to tell them we are glad we
are the best at whatever we do. When you here someone explain with "oh
it's cause she's a woman" nicely say "Your mom is a woman".
Finally, i would like to say amounggst every division that humans have
found to fight about in the world Race, religion, countries when it comes to
gender we are not struggling for supremacy, we are just asking for Equality.
How hard is that?
By George Agba
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